Note: The basis of this review is limited. Although the author has forwarded me their complete manuscript, I have refrained from further reading because the book lacks a particular element in its writing. All grades are based on honest evaluations and will be supplemented by a couple of examples to prove my point.
Jack Dervish, Super Spy
By JC Andrijeski
Cold Honest Truth:
- Even for children, this book is a boring one.
OVERALL RATING: C-
I am finding myself feeling slightly more annoyed by how the book is poorly executed than the concept of the idea itself. Jack does seem to be more interesting as a ‘four year old’ who happens to witness his parents murder, but the storyline alone is not a valid reason for me to continue reading if you are going to make the work more redundant than necessary. For instance, the story kept repeating words like ‘wondering, useless, and waited.’ Sometimes this style has gotten so annoying that I kept waiting and waiting, and waiting when were you planning to do away with the useless repetition. If you are going to make the book sound interesting, at least try to use variation in your vocabulary, the story sounds worse than a toddler’s book.
The only things I could find that are particularly worth noting about the characters were the facts that Jack was four-year old child whose parents had been allegedly murdered. There is no distinct impression about him, his parents, or anyone else from the book that made me want to engage into the book. If there was something I could recommend, it would be to start researching children’s books for the genre the book aims at. Another suggestion to take into consideration is to distribute this book to ten different children who do not know you or care for your work particularly and will most definitely tell you the truth. I would not be surprised if the children would agree with my comment.
By now you can probably tell that I am not entirely thrilled with your book and this is one of the chief reasons why I would never want to buy the book. If something had to be said about what completely turned me off, this section would be it. I do not know how many pauses and redundant errors I could take before putting the book down and read it no more. ‘So he waited, and waited’, and waited, until the plot got more interesting. Not to mention the dozens of times Jack’s ‘useless age of four’ could be used (the several times used was six before I got bored with counting). The worst of these problems is the fact the style of book seems to appeal to first graders and not 9-12 year olds. Plenty of time I have seen kids having the ability to read other books like the Secret Garden or Harry Potter. The levels of sophistication can go a lot further beyond what is intended.
Cover Design: A+
I love the cover.
Although I admit that you did a great job with getting the right amount of spaces put between the lines and paragraphs, a few things stay missing e.g. justified text, page numbers, and the proper publishing pages.